OK, it is fixed. Anyone who is interested, here is what I think happened and how it was fixed ... no proof of this as the failure mode, its just how I'm piecing it together.... The two things: keyfob program fail and memory function fail at the same apparent time were unrelated but coincidental. This is probably more than you wanted to know... First, I'm installing a ham radio. The transmitter is located on the side of the center console near my right knee... as far forward as practical BUT, it will still interfere with the full forward position of the seat travel. Because the wiring is going through the body plug under the seat I moved the seat forward to get it out of my way. I suspect that I tried to run it to far forward and the resistance caused by the interference with the radio must have set an error in the memory module and thus disabling the program functionality (so that the memory doesn't try to put the seat in a place that it cannot go). Second, somewhere in there I got the "bee in my bonnet" to program the key fob. It didn't work because the memory module was in error mode.
The fix. I don't know if every one of these steps is necessary but this is what I did:
1) Get the radio (or whatever is in the way), out of the way.
2) Set the ignition to accessory
3) Move the seat in every direction to its furthest extreme. You can hear the relay click at the end of each travel direction.
4) I did this with the mirrors as well but I suspect that was not necessary (next time I will try seat only first).
5) Start the engine, program a seat position and verify it works.
Done.
Now I'm going to try the key fob link again. If that doesn't work or this all goes sideways again .... I'll report back.
Cheers